West Coast Time

You may not have noticed this, but the world pretty much runs on Eastern Standard Time. I remember for instance, back when I lived in the central time zone (the farm, Springfield, Nashville, and everywhere in between), the ads on t.v. would remind us that this or that show was coming on at 8, 7 central. So the real time for the show was at 8, and the central time for the show was at 7. There was no mention of mountain or pacific time. And now I find myself in that lost time zone on the west coast.

It first sunk in when Dr. Phil and Oprah were on t.v. during the afternoon this week. Now these shows are supposed to come on at 3 and 4 p.m. respectively, at least in Nashville. That would mean they should come on at 1 and 2 p.m. respectively in Seattle. But no, Dr. Phil and Oprah still came on NBC at 3 and 4. Do you see what's wrong with this picture? Everyone in the eastern half of the country has already seen Dr. Phil and Oprah. It may seem like a small thing, but multiply that by every show out there. How can I trust my t.v. any more? When the Jonas Brothers were on the Today show at 10:30 this morning was it really "live" as the t.v. screen said? That would make it 1:30 eastern time. Where the Jonas brothers playing at 1:30 EST or 10:30 EST? For that matter, when is the ten o'clock news? How am I supposed to know?

Now lest you think that the west coast is just screwed, I need you to know I've come to another conclusion. This time zone differential does not mean those of us who live in the west are bound to live a few hours behind everyone else. Indeed not. Rather, that means that the mountains are not the only thing that separates us from the rest of the country. The mechanics of time have left us no choice except to say good riddance. While it's after midnight in most of Kansas, it's barely after 10 here, and I'm enjoying a romantic comedy on lifetime. When those of you in Nashville wake up and head for work, think of us in the west still sleeping.

Time and the brilliant geography of the pacific northwest leave us isolated from that magical Eastern Standard Time. But that's okay, because here the seconds do tick off just a little bit differently. I can't explain it quite yet. Maybe I'll be able to in time.